These past few weeks I have been getting serious about a project that I have been starting and putting off again for far too long. There are closets and shelves begging to be organized.
And so it began. And there are definite signs that I am making progress. And as I do, the confusion grows. Mounds of books taken off the shelves seem to multiply like rabbits. The piles to give away teeter and topple. But that’s not nearly as bad as the pile to be re-read. I open every book and if I can’t recall the plot by reading the first page, it goes to the “to be read” pile.
That pile however calls my name, and since we have been “enjoying” cabin fever type weather here, (rain, snow, ice, and repeat) it is a delightful break…. to sit and read and enjoy stories long forgotten. What a perfect reason to procrastinate and curl up under an afghan and enjoy a well written book. Yet as the books pile up, and the unfinished baby blanket warns me that grandson # 3 is coming soon–only 8 more weeks to go… and more importantly a house guest is coming in a few weeks…. it is time to finish the task and stop taking breaks for a whole day to read. Those books will still be there….There is work to be done.
I think of Lent as something of a spiritual cleansing time. A time to pull out of ourselves old habits and behaviors and ask, “are these helpful in the Kingdom of God.” Certainly my habits of procrastination and distraction that lead to half-completed tasks isn’t helpful at all. There is much value in deadlines, after all sermons need to be ready before Sunday morning, there are no extensions here.
There are other habits that are not helpful….
impatience… I confess that I do not have a lot of patience when people don’t change in the ways that I am certain my highly inspired sermons and workshops leading. How arrogant of me to forget that I am often slow to change when God’s Spirit speaks to me….
Frustration comes to mind. How can a group of well meaning, intelligent adults behave in such short sighted ways. Sadly that often leads me to ambivalence when I just think, “Oh well, nothing will change things,” and I forget that with God all things are possible.
Forgetfulness, sadly is often a part of my character make-up, as I forget the God who beckons me to come and sit with him, to talk, to listen and to learn.
Oh and let us not forget, doubt, despair, fear, a lack of faith and and a failure to trust….
But this is Lent, a time for a spiritual housecleaning so that I will be ready to see the glory of the resurrection and proclaim with Mary and the other disciples…. My Lord and My God.
I guess I need to get on with it….