Four and a half years ago I came home from the humane society with a grey striped bundle of attitude. The first thing he did was scope out the house and decide that the bed in the guest room belonged to him. From that point on every night we went upstairs together and said goodnight and retired to our own rooms.
A few days later he showed signs of severe intestinal upset, and my carpets have never been the same since. He was diagnosed with food allergies and started on a special diet, which he stayed on until last January.
In January he developed stones in his bladder, had a bladder and kidney infection and a blocked urinary tract. I chronicled his hunger strike as he objected to a change in his diet and I may have mentioned the blood dripping down my arms after attempts to push the medication down his throat.
Sadly the issues around the kidney problems have led us to this point. I have just returned from the long, lonely, sad trip to the Vet, where I said goodbye to my Friend.
This has been a difficult year. This month will be especially difficult as I pack and prepare to put my stuff into storage and stay with friends until God reveals the next phase of my life.
This is my time to sorrow. Today I cry…. even so, I wait for my time of joy. I wait upon God.
It is as is written in Ecclesiastes:
There’s an opportune time to do things, a right time for everything on the earth:
A right time for birth and another for death,
A right time to plant and another to reap,
A right time to kill and another to heal,
A right time to destroy and another to construct,
A right time to cry and another to laugh,
A right time to lament and another to cheer,
A right time to make love and another to abstain,
A right time to embrace and another to part,
A right time to search and another to count your losses,
A right time to hold on and another to let go,
A right time to rip out and another to mend,
A right time to shut up and another to speak up,
A right time to love and another to hate,
A right time to wage war and another to make peace.
But in the end, does it really make a difference what anyone does?
My life has known it’s share of sorrow. I have also known my share of joy. My life is like most people’s lives. There is an ebb and flow, a balance. Sometimes when it seems as if the balance is skewed to the sorrow and trouble we want to complain. But always, God shows us the pathway to joy and to blessing. And so having determined last week to live in faith and in trust…. I do just that. With the writer of Ecclesiastes, I place my trust in God, and wait in hope.
I’ve also concluded that whatever God does, that’s the way it’s going to be, always. No addition, no subtraction. God’s done it and that’s it. That’s so we’ll quit asking questions and simply worship in holy fear.
Whatever was, is.
Whatever will be, is.
That’s how it always is with God.