It has been a long time since I have written. So much has happened and life has definitely taken on a different rhythm.
Last month I moved to another province and am now living with my daughter and her family. I have started looking for work in places other than the church. There are some interesting possibilities, and hopefully some of them will be an extension of the work and ministry in which I was previously engaged. A friend has reminded me that we are called to be servants in all that we do. That is a good thing to remember.
When I arrived here I was reading in Matthew. It was definitely time to take a break from the wanderings of Moses and the desert time that I was going through. Instead of feeding my faith, it was reinforcing my sense of hopelessness. So I switched gears–and testaments–and started reading Matthew.
Those first few chapters fed my soul. Jesus words focused on grace and the gifts of God. He talked about relaxing into the rhythms of grace. I am beginning to see that rhythms of grace in my life, and am starting to reflect on the prayers of my past and how they have fit into the new grace that I am seeing.
For years now I have been praying for the chance to live closer to my family, primarily my daughter and my grandsons. That desire was so strong, but what I did not realize was that when prayer is answered, and when we enter grace we leave something behind. So yes,even the Scriptures from the desert speak in this new grace that I am living. For the people to enter the promised land they had to leave the security of Egypt, endure the desert and learn to trust God.
For me to enter the life I have desired with the closeness of family interaction, I had to leave the church. Being so discouraged with the church, that was easy, and yet involved a great deal of grief. I love that work, but I know that I have gifts and abilities that will translate into meaningful work and ministry in other areas of God’s Kingdom. I look forward to seeing what that will be.
For now though, I look for work and anticipate the future that awaits, and I enjoy life and relish the grace that comes with it.
Life is different that’s for sure. Life with three boys under the age of 5 has a whole other kind of rhythm.
This life is busy, loud and full in ways that I could previously only imagine. Every day is filled with the sharing of love, reading stories, hugs, cuddles and even games. It seems that the best racecourse in the house is up and down my body. It seems that I live to serve as gym equipment as the boys climb on me, jump on me and bounce on me. This new life is filled with joy, and this joy will continue as when the job I am called to comes into my life and I find a new home of my own, it will be close enough to have those regular moments of joyful play and active cuddles.
I am living grace and I am eager to embrace all that this new grace will bring.